Thursday, April 17, 2025

The Pursuit of Gentleness, Part 3: The Lid

 

Hey, Cobblestone,

     Hear now the Parable of the Orange Juice Jug:

    Back before humans had civilized themselves, orange juice came in jugs with fussy lids. After pouring the delightful contents, the human was required to line up the lid, find the start of the thread, and give it a full turn to close it tightly. It was quite a strain on humanity, delaying for perhaps a full second the enjoyment of the deliciousness. And then some clever person, probably a direct descendant of the great inventors of the early Twentieth Century, devised a lid that could be slapped onto the jug at any old orientation, given a quick right-y/tight-y quarter turn, and – viola! – be done and all.

     Well, one evening, with generations of family gathering ‘round my table, I reached for a glorious jug with the cleverly updated lid. Inside was the good stuff – pulp and all – and it needed a good shake to make sure all was fair. And shake it I did, vigorously enough to pop the lid completely off. O-F-F. Not loose, not askew, but all the way o-f-f off. It had been given the slap, but not the quarter-twist. I looked straight at the perpetrator – the one who is one flesh with me – and cried, “Put a lid on it, will ya?!”

     Another male-and-married member of the family saw it all as comical: juice all over the counter; pulp, like a booger, hanging from my nose; and the rocketed lid making its final gyrations on the floor. He laughed heartily. His wife shot daggers with her eyes. Children wailed. My bride was crushed. Three generations of harshness were suddenly loose in the house.

     You might think the blame would be righteously placed on the non-lid-putter-on-er, but no. I had violated a biblical mandate, the one that forms the basis of our “Pursuit of Gentleness” series of letters:

Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near (Philippians 4:5).

     Here’s what I’ve seen, and consider to be a rule of human nature: In the absence of gentleness, harshness happens. Without a commitment to gentleness-forward, harshness will stand at lock-and-load with a hair trigger. We might think we can catch it in time, but harshness needs little opportunity to cause big problems. With a mere 6.5 words, I had brought down the house.

     With my upcoming retirement from the staff of Cobblestone, today’s letter is my last to you, Church, for the foreseeable future. I believe Jesus would be pleased for me to take my best shot at busting some myths about gentleness, as follows:

     Myth: Gentleness is passive; it sits in the background, waiting for a quiet moment to be heard. Busted: Gentleness is active; it preempts the need for reconciliation by averting the sin of harshness. The Bible verse says, Let your gentleness be evident to all. What could be passive about that?

     Myth: Gentleness requires a thick skin; maintain an even keel and a stony face until the temptation to harshness has passed. Busted: Gentleness requires depth of spirit; let the offense drop into the still waters of forgiveness. The Bible verse says, The Lord is near. Gentleness has a short shelf life, which is why we have the Holy Spirit inside to rotate and replenish, to freshen the stock. Thick skin leads to bitter waters; depth of spirit is a healing pool for all parties involved.

     Myth: Gentleness is for losers; only those who can’t claw their way to the top will fall back on this cover-up for defeat. Busted: Let me introduce you to the gentlest winner of all – his name is Jesus. Another Bible passage says, Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted (Hebrews 12:1-3).  

     This letter is being posted on Good Friday. Could there possibly be a better time to “Consider him who endured…”? Sometimes, when I step aside from the lightning-bolt pace of life, I wonder what will survive the second coming of our King – what attitudes or institutions, what monuments to human cleverness, what practices among men will not be burned up? Arrogance, cynicism, the willingness to step on the heads of others for upward mobility – these all crowd instantly, in my mind, into the class of “wood, hay, straw” mentioned in 1Corinthians 3:12. The first to go. The tinder that sets all else ablaze – just like it does now. Happily, one of the divine attributes that transfers readily to humanity is… gentleness. Thank you, Jesus!  

     How many orange juice jug lids have been ejected since that fateful night? I’ve lost count, because I decided not to – count, that is. But those lids do serve as a reminder. I don’t fear the lids. I don’t fear the non-lid-putter-on-er with whom I am living life out of the same refrigerator. I do, however, have an adversarial respect for the tendency to harshness that lies close to the surface. And I remember: The Lord is near. Nearer than the harshness. Stronger than the pull of self-pity. More reliable than any human device.

     I commend to you the gentleness of no less than Jesus himself. This is what we – all of us in the household of God – owe to each other, for Christ’s sake.

 

 Grace and Peace forever and always,

 

John  

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